I got the call to say that none of our eggs fertilised and it was the most heartbreaking thing i've ever experienced. I literally can't explain the disappointment. The worst thing was, the embryologist was baffled as to why it hadn't worked! She said the sperm and eggs were both good quality..In fact, my eggs had survived the ordeal! They had activated with the presence of the sperm, they just hadn't got to the fertilisation stage. So so sad.
I know you shouldn't expect it to work first time but you just do. It's one of them things, they tell you to stay positive and think positive (because non positive thoughts can affect the process apparently!) but then you build it up in your head and when it goes wrong its the worst feeling, its crushing. You both feel like total failures. We spent most of Friday crying and being generally miserable.
I'd like to say i will be more cautious with my feelings and expectations next time, but because our scenario is so-called 'rare' i am optimistic it will work next time. IT HAS TOO!
I refuse to believe i won't be a mum one day. I really want to experience pregnancy.
There are so many people on facebook and instagram posting Halloween pictures of their babies and its so frustrating. Obviously they are free to do that and when i have a child i will do the same, but it still doesn't make it any easier.
I thought i'd share my timeline and meds:
Day 1: Period arrived, I started Bureselin 0.5mg injections for 3 weeks to shut down my system.
Day 21: Had a scan to check my womb lining was ready, and it was. I carried on taking Bureselin but also started Menopur 150mg the next day to stimulate the ovaries.
Day 8 of stims (friday): Had a scan to check the progress of my follicles. I had 7 on each side measuring around 10mm-13mm. And lots of little ones around them.
Day 11 (Mon): Had another scan and i had 24 follicles(eggs) measuring between 10mm-15mm, i had one at 19mm.
Day 13 (Wed): Had another scan and i still had 24 follicles(eggs) measuring between 10mm-21mm
I got given my trigger injection Ovitrelle 250mg, and took it at 8:15pm. Retrieval is in 36 hours!
Day 15 (Fri): Egg Collection day! 8:15am i went into theatre to be put to sleep. They retrieved 9 eggs, 6 were mature enough to inject with sperm. I went home, i was sick (i drank to soon after waking up) and felt abit swolen but generally in a good mood.
Saturday: Got the call that none of our eggs fertilised.
I am taking Fragmin, to thin my blood as they classed me as having mild OHSS, I also have a tablet to help the syndrome. I still need to take this injection till i have my period.
I have an appointment on 16th November with my Fertility Doctor to find out when we can start again and get some feedback.
Apparently because we didn't get fertilisation and a transfer it isn't classed as 'a go' therefore we still have two more goes at this. Please keep your fingers crossed for us.
Has anyone else been through this? Please comment if you have.
